Remixed Movie Trailers

I don't know how some people can claim that The Shining is one of the best horror flicks around. It looks like a family friendly movie to me.

On the other hand, I'd say the frightful streets in West Side Story seems like a new take on zombie movies while Titanic is a standard horror flick.

(Apparently, all three come from "an assistants competition in recutting a trailer of a movie in a different genre". I've traced the links back to this blog (see Sept 29, and Sept 26). So credit where credit's due)

Bruce Lee & Cat Fights

Have you seen Bruce Lee's 1964 screen test? Dizzamn! Too fast for the camera!

Random Bruce Lee fact: Bruce Lee was the Cha Cha Champion of Hong Kong in 1958. He worked part time as a Cha Cha instructor for a short time when he returned to San Francisco in April 1959.

--

Kitten War! How can you people say dogs are better than cats?


The wonderful thing about Tiggers, is that Tiggers are wonderful things...


"I'd like it wrapped up, please"

New record?

Three days.

They say "nothing lasts forever," I know that and I'm fine with that. But who would have thought three bloody days (and 5 hours).

Fucking eh, eh? Eh.

Entertainment Value

There's a new Grow puzzle game over at Eyemaze called Grow Cube. Took me about 30 minutes to solve it, but I was loved it every second. I blogged about other Eyemaze puzzle games previously.

Speaking of games, I'm an adventure game junkie and one that I'm particularly looking forward to is Indigo Prophesy (AKA Fahrenheit outside of North America). Played the demo, and I'm very intrigued.

Still on the topic of awesome stuff, Serenity is coming out on Friday September 30th. It apparently continues the story of one of my all time favourite TV series, Firefly (which Fox in its infinite wisdom cancelled after showing only nine episodes out of sequence).

Let me make this clear now: If this movie isn't a resounding box office hit, and I find out that you did not pay for a movie ticket to go watch this movie, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU IN REEVER-LIKE FASHION! No power in the 'verse can stop me!

If you ask nicely, I may lend out my DVD version of the series.

And if you can sing the song of the Hero of Canton, the man they call Jayne, forgive me if I say I think you're awful shiney and want to bear your man babies.

(Hooray for Firefly references!)

Teach a man to fish...

I keep talking to others about how you should not expect change to occur overnight, yet I'm guilty of doing the same. I suppose what I should be preaching is that only expecting change does very little to enact change. If you want the change to happen, you should be proactive about it; meet it head on.

-- Posted May 2, 2005 (link)

I don't need a helping hand so much as I need motivation. I know this. I want this. Yet I don't do it.

Could it be I don't exactly know how?

Somebody teach me to fish.

* * * * *

Why do you like dirty things?

It's not dirty, it's "rustic". I think it's cool.

Given a little more thought, a rustic appearance gives me the feeling that it's been lived in... used, if you will. As if it had a purpose, fulfilled it, and is now taking a well deserved rest from the pristine regulations and requirements that previously commanded it. I suppose I see it as the symbolic representation of an ideal progression through the various phases of life.

Where others see dirt and rust, I see analogies and opportunities for self-righteous philosophying.

I believe I've partaken of this fish too often; I need to learn to catch another kind.

Deliberate Deliberations

I'm tired.

You're always tired, man.

Yeah, but not for much longer, though. I think I'm started to get tired of it.

Get tired of what?

Of getting tired.

What?

Don't you ever get tired of being tired? You know... so tired of being tired all the time that you instead start to be energized?

Dude... what?

It's like when I get tired of eating Fruit Loops all the time, I'll switch to Raisin Bran or Frosted Flakes. I figure once I get tired of being tired, I'll switch to being energized.

Do you even listen to yourself speak anymore?

Of course, I suppose I'll eventually get tired of being energized and move on to being angry or irritated... maybe even switching back to tired if the others don't work out. Don't mess with what works, that's what they say, right?

Do you ever get tired of being a jerk-wad?

... Sometimes.

Crazy going slowly am I

Ever feel like just going crazy? Just because?

I feel like running down the street, greeting people with "Porkchop" and asking them, "Have your fingers ever tasted a cylindrical song that is quite tightly yellow?"

I imagine some people may look at me funny, or try not to look at me at all. While others would ask what is wrong with me.

To which I would reply, "Fish"

Then may then proceed to point at various things that my eye stumbles upon and rename their colours with words like "blellow", "grink", and "foosball".

I imagine that I would be quite fond of the colour, "foosball".

Foosball. Ever say a word so much that it loses meaning? Foosball. Foooooooosball.

Inner Monologue Exposé!

Sometimes people ask me what's on my mind. I usually reply with a "nothing, really" or a "don't worry about it."

Here are a few thoughts that passed through my head this last week:

Watching TV:

I hate Tweety Bird. I hate Tweety Bird with a passion and the only reason I watched Looney Toons as a child was for the small glimmer of a dream that Sylvester would finally get his paws on Tweety and him shut up for good.

On the road:

If I swerve off the road... would that shut him up? No, his bitching would probably just get worse.

Unless it's such a fantastic collision that at least one of us bites it. Then either he won't be able to talk or I won't be able to listen!

Genius!

Wait a minute... what if we both bite it and I end up listening to him for all eternity?

...

Better not risk it.

Over dinner:

I wonder if jamming this chopstick in my ear would be too subtle of a hint.

Over another dinner:

Don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts, don't stare at her breasts...

...

Okay, just a quick peek...

Rollerblading the seawall:

If I were a piece of wood, what kind of wood would I be?

Moving day:

[Rocking out to various songs in my head]

Is someone getting the best,
the best, the best, the best of you
(Best of You - Foo Fighters)

Mr. Jones and me tell each other fairy tales
and we stare at the beautiful women
She's looking at you...
Oh no no she looking at me
(Mr Jones - Counting Crows)

Dream on, Dream on, Dream on, Dream on,
Dream on, Dream on, Dream on, AAAHHHHHhhhHhhHHhhHhh!
(Dream On - Aerosmith)

At work:

...
...
...

I'm really not that bright or interesting.

Double Entendres of Ordered Randomness

I'm
missing the point? yeah, that happens.
Something has changed and Not for the better,
maybe
it's Nothing but
you should always read between the lines.

Water balloon mayhem

Control yourself people. I almost ruined a perfectly good pink shirt!

You heard me, PINK!

Float like a butterfly...

On Friday, I attended the free open-air VSO concert at Deer Lake with Najin. Good performance, although being an open-air concert, everything was played through speakers, which really can't compare to hearing an orchestra perform in an acoustically designed hall.

Of note (because these were the only ones I recognized) were their renditions of some Tchaikovsky pieces and a selection from Carmen.

Also, 16 year old Christopher Lee from Korea performed a clarinet solo punctuated by lots of bobbing-shadow-boxing-type movements. Just when you thought he'd stop... he'd bob again. Hehe, "bob". Took a video of it, I'll see if I get around to posting it later. All kidding aside, though, he was really very good.

And as a warning to you all, resist the temptation of "fresh cut french fries". They really aren't as good as they sound. Sure, I finished off one and a half large trays of them... but remember who's talking. That itself doesn't say much.

[Rant] Break a fu.cking leg

You know what annoys me? People who say "good luck" annoy me.

Not only is it cliche and shows no imagination and very little effort on part of the person saying it, but it also implies that if you should succeed or do well then it is a result of chance, not merit.

Whenever I hear, "good luck," I assume the stipend of, "you'll need it". The implication is that your abilities either aren't up to par or your abilities don't matter. With the former, it's just an insult. With the latter, your success or failure is a function of luck or fate and not any thing particular that you did. And as you may know, I am a firm disbeliever in fate.

So what do I suggest as an alternative to "good luck"? How about "go kick some ass".

Have an important game or test coming up? Go kick some ass!

Have an interview tomorrow? Go kick some ass!

Hitting up a girl at the bar? Go kick some ass!

Trying to train a stubborn donkey? Go kick some ass!

Go kick some ass!

Or for something a little more civilized, an "I hope you do well" would suffice. Sure, you can read some implications in that phrase as well (lack of understanding of the person's skills or situation, hope => pray => you need some outside help) but I think it's an improvement over "good luck".

Or how about "You can DO IT!"

That works too.

You're not "special"!

So I've been using my PocketPC (Dell Axim X3) pretty religiously for the last 4 months, keeping track of appointments, contacts, and whatnot. Well, for the last 4 months minus three days. Three days that my axim lay sitting on top of my desk... not plugged in.

And for the third time in a year (you'd think I'd learn) my axim ran out of battery power and I LOST ALL MY DATA!

Running out of battery power I can understand. Designing a device that stores information in volatile RAM when it's a mobile device that most assuredly won't have continual access to an external power supply is one of the most retarded ideas I can think of.

That's right, not "special". Just retarded.

Yes, I have a working, up-to-date backup of my data, but spending the time and effort to roll out the data is more than I'm willing to take. When I was backpacking through Europe, there were a few near scares when I had to sneak quick charges at trainstations for fear of losing my data. Well, no more I can tell you that.

Pen and paper. That's the shit.

(Anybody out there interested in a Dell Axim X3? Despite my glowing review, it's actually pretty cool and useful! Really!)

The Beautiful Country (Movie Impressions)

I saw The Beautiful Country yesterday at Tinseltown (which, by the way... on second thought, I'll save this rant for another day).

It follows the story of Binh (Damien Nguyen), child of a Vietnamese mother and an American GI, as he searches for his mother, and then for a life in America. And while some loose threads are unresolved by the end, the final scene is very satisfying.

I did, however, have 2 problems with the movie.

Being Vietnamese myself, I understood most of the Vietnamese dialog and can say with some authority that the subtitling was terrible. If it was only couple lines here and there I would have forgiven it, but for the majority of the first act, Vietnamese was the only language spoken. I understand that translations are inherently difficult, especially going from languages that are completely unrelated. Differing idioms, sentence structure, and wordplay wreak havoc when trying to do a translation true to the original. Often what you end up with is something that is either all too literal to the meanings of individual words, or something that has taken a few liberties to try and maintain the spirit and convey the same meaning of the original work. What we had in The Beautiful Country was neither.

Most all lines were streamlined and simplified to 2 or 3 word sentences. Some lines took a lot of strayed so far from the actual spoken words that I had to scratch my head. And other lines weren't subtitled at all.

I've heard of bad dubbing/translations before, but what I don't understand is how this could happen when the people credited with the writing and directed are all Caucasion.

The only reasonable explanation I can come up with is that the writers had some brief notes that were given to a Vietnamese dialog specialist to flesh out, and through miscommunication or time/budgetary concerns, those brief notes ended up being used as the subtitles.

The other problem I had was with a certain plot element. What kind of crazy ship sails from Malasia to New York, fricken New York. Instead of going across the Pacific to some sane destination like Los Angelos, let's take the scenic route below Africa and across the Atlantic. If the writers really wanted to have Binh in New York (although the story didn't really need New York. Any major metropolitan city in America would have sufficed), have the boat land on a Pacific Rim dock and then have the slave trucks drive him over.

Okay, maybe a third problem is that I don't understand people's fascination with China-Doll type women. Don't understand it, probably never will.

Other than these two (and a half) points, I thoroughly enjoyed the movie. A friend said it was too slow paced, but I thought the pacing was fine. It's a drama, not a popcorn-action flick. Be glad it wasn't Dragonball Z proportions of epic sucky pacing.

Global W(Arr!)ming...

Recently found a link to hilarious satirical open letter to the kansas school board that advocates teaching the FSM (Flying Spagetti Monster) theory of ID (Intelligent Design) alongside evolution and other ID theories in schools.

Now I'm not going to get into the debate of the merits of ID as a scientific theory to be taught in schools, but rather I'd like to focus on another issue that was touched on in this open letter.

The trend of global warming is inversely related to the number of pirates!



You know what this means, the pirates have been losing ground over hundreds of years to their mortal enemies... the ninja.

For the sake of the world... for the sake of the children, we need more pirates. And we need them now.

Arr, matey!

VS

Patterns in life

Looking over my SFU transcript, and alarming pattern emerged.

Every year, my marks would peak in the Summer semester before taking a drastic fall in the Fall semester.

Every.
Single.
Year.

I even made a chart to illustrate the point:


Okay, so 2004 doesn't follow the pattern exactly since summer semester isn't the highest that year, but that was the only semester that I only took one course, so let's consider it an anomaly. But the Fall semester is still my worst GPA wise.

Delving back, summer-time is when I had lots of distractions from my school work, and fall semester was always the semester I promised myself that I'd crack down and get serious about school.

So what have I learned from this? Don't try so hard. I do my best when I'm not trying. It's when I try my best that everything goes in the crapper. Best intentions and all that jazz?

In other words, motivated underachievement works!

(or it could be related to taking on a larger workload and more intensive courses during the Fall. Who really knows...)

[Rant] The 7 Habits of Highly Effective CSR's (or, "Would you like some bread sticks, too?")

Is it too much to ask for people not to half-ass their jobs?

When ordering a pizza, I've become annoyed with the CSR's too such a point where I'm sure there are nasty comments on my file. Call me crazy if it's not reasonable to expect a modicum of competency from people who's sole job is to answer the fucking phone.

In the past, I worked at a Pizza chain's call centre for three years. I heard it all; the horror stories CSR's have to tell about customers are endless and, sadly, mostly true. However, it goes both ways. While you can get a bad customer, there are also lots of poor CSR's out there.

Here's a few tips on how to be a decent CSR and not have customers bitching at you.

1) Don't answer the phone as if it's a terrible inconvenience.

Pardon me if I interrupted your reading time or your card game with the CSR next to you. Your job is to take calls, dingus. Your supervisor (should) have told you, "You can hear a smile through a phone," and believe it or not, it's not just corporate bullshit, it's true. Speech tones are infectious, so if you sound nice and helpful, chances are the customer on the other end will try to do the same. (Hmm... on that note, maybe I shouldn't have called you a dingus.)

2) LISTEN to what the customer on the line says.

If I ask what specials you have tonight, I don't want to have to give you my phone number and address before you answer my question. I understand that the order taking system you use may require that information before actually placing the order, but that's no reason for not being able to answer simple questions that have nothing to do with delivery time or price.

Also, if I order a pizza with capicollo and sun-dried tomatoes, that's what I want. If I end up getting a pizza with capicollo and diced tomatoes, I'm not a happy customer.

3) Know what you're talking about

If I ask you what size your large pizza is, your next sentence shouldn't start with "I think..." and it sure as hell better not have a "maybe" in it. While thinking is fine, guessing is not. If you don't know it off the top of your head, a simple "If you give me a moment I can find out," (with the intention of following through on it) can do wonders. "It depends," accompanied by a (mandatory) quantifying phrase is also acceptable.

4) Don't leave me in the dark

If it's going to take a minute or two to find the information to answer my question or process my order, tell me.

If you're going to put me on hold for over 5 minutes, tell me.

If there's a way to make things go smoother for both you and me, tell me.

If your quoted price doesn't include delivery, taxes, or other charges, tell me.

If you're going to call me back, tell me. Especially if the order won't go through until you get back in touch with me. It may be another number you need to dial to reach me, or the party/game/music may be too loud to hear the phone unless I'm expecting it.

Related to this, we have the fifth item...

5) Don't pass the buck

If you don't tell me that you're going to call me back, and you can't reach me because I turned off my phone or some other such business, who's fault is that? Any CSR worth her/his salt would not say it's the customer's. Did you tell me you were going to call back? Did you confirm the phone number? And when did the 30 minutes or less timer start? Common sense would indicate that, unless indicated otherwise, it starts exactly the moment you said it. Not 2 minutes after the call back confirmation.

And if I call back to complain about this or anything else, don't imply that it's my fault, don't say it's some other CSR, or the because of the computer. Just make strides to fix my problem. Chances are, I'm more interested in a resolution than playing the blame game.

6 & 7) Do your fucking job

It's your gad-damned job. You voluntarily applied for this job. Please, have some self-respect, pride, and common sense to do your job well. If not for my benefit or the benefit of the customers, then for yourself. It can make customers more helpful and your job easier. A good recommendation and employment history can result as well.

And if not to better yourself, then do the above to spite all those idiot customers you're bound to get. If I never hear somebody ask the price for a 2 topping pizza, then order a 4 topping specialty pizza and complain why it's more expensive than the price I quoted, it'll be too soon.

Or people trying to redeem coupons that they don't really have.

Or customers who think they're so smart and knowledgeable about the system.

God, customers piss me off.

(I'm aware of the irony!)

Grow RPG

Grow was a Flash puzzle game I stumbled upon a while ago. The basic premise is to keep adding gadgets to a ball for it to continually grow and evolve. Certain gadgets have more growth phases than others, and certain growth phases have prerequisites, so using a little bit of grey matter and a lot of trial and error, you have to find the precise order that will evolve the ball into it's complete form.

Confusing? Just give it a try, you'll understand.

But the reason I mention it is that the maker has made a semi-sequal titled Grow RPG. Same premise, different animations and objects, but still amazingly addictive. Maybe even more so than the original.



Figuring the right order is all of the fun, so try not to spoil yourselves by Googling the solution. If you want a bit of a hint, I've taken screen shots of the end solution for both games:

Grow end shot
Grow RPG end shot

Edit: Fixed up unfinished thoughts and half-completed sentences. I used to be able to write coherently on the first try, I swear!

Milky Way : Home Galaxy for the Hopelessly Addicted BBS'er

Press ESC twice to blast off to the Milkyway...

If you were in Greater Vancouver and a fellow BBS'er in the 90's, this phrase should bring up memories; it was the load screen for arguably the most popular local BBS at the time, The Milky Way. I spent a good chunk of the mid to late nineties playing LORD, that Lemonade Stand game, and posting away in the message boards. While I went under many guises, Padishar was the handle most people knew me as.

It made highschool a little more fun and added a little diversity into the mix, allowing me to meet many cool local people in the pre-internet boom era. Milky Way was probably also the main factor in my leaning towards computers and technology and away from soccer and sports. Good or bad? Well, while I claim to be half-decent at soccer (Junior Boys MVP, baby!) I doubt I could have made a career out of it.

The reason for this nostalgia is that the sysop of my once favourite BBS recently passed away. Should I mourn? Should I grieve? Would it be insincere to do so for somebody you barely knew? Instead I will choose to remember the joys that you made possible. Well wishes, Pdk. I hope you knew what joy your BBS and actions brought to many lives.

Gary Golf strikes again!

I was doing some cleaning when I happened upon my copy of SimGolf. I remembered loving this game way back when, so I decided to reinstall it for nostalgia's sake.

Now I remember why I uninstalled it.

This game has taken over my life.



Damn you Sid Meier! At the end of last year it was your remake of Pirates! that had me consumed. Let's just be glad I didn't pull out that other classic Sid Meier game I have in my closet, namely Alpha Centauri. I'd never see sunlight ever again. (never got into the Civilization series, but Alpha Centauri was pure turn-based heroin as far as I'm concerned)

SimGolf NEEDS a sequel. It DEMANDS a sequel. Or at the very least, a remake in the vein of Pirates!

Alright, now that I've gotten that off my chest, it's back to boozing and schmoozing I.M. Picky and Ivanna Richman. Gotta keep expanding my golf course and buy that snazzy airport!

(Somebody... for the love of all that is holy, help me kick this habit!)