Caffeine... Part II

*crash*

Caffeine

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Brain Exhaust

That's just the way it's got to be...

You know what I find irresistibly attracting? Hint: it's not white lies and subtle deception.

When we plan to meet up, it's because I want to see you. I'm not there to listen to that guy that always seems to be around, spouting of his narrow view of how we should relate, of how our relationship should work.

Seriously, dude's gotta stop cock blocking.

That's it, I don't need it and I'm not so sure that you're worth it.

Call me again when you lose the douche.

[hidden]
I'm sorry, religion, but that's just the way it's got to be.
[/hidden]

--

"I don't want to say"
... is a perfectly acceptable answer.

Naturally, this answer doesn't preclude the other person from continuing to try and pry... hmmm... is that why people lie? To avoid follow-up questions and assumptions that go with it.

Of course once you're caught in a lie, even worse questions and assumptions will follow suit.

Where's the respect?

--

Like brothers on a hotel bed

B: I don't know why I said it.

C: Yeah, you do.

B: It's not about that.

C: Come on, this isn't the first time something like this has happened.

B: Please, that's totally different.

C: Dude, you said it twice in 3 minutes.

B: Whatever.

C: Dude, just admit it.

B: Never.

Somebody's Smiling Like an Idiot

[hidden]
... but this time it's not me.
[/hidden]

Quit stealing my lines, foo!

Let the count begin anew

One!
[hidden]
=)
[/hidden]

Mmm... pepper

I fought to get an extra day in Vancouver.
I wanted to spend it with you.

I worked extra hours to make the time.
Finally, things were sorted out.

I picked up the phone.
I dialed the number.

That chiming ring...
My heart murmured with excitement.

Then nine little words formed a mill,
crushing my spirit like peppercorns...

"The Shins Feb 19th show is already sold out"

My crushed pepper spirit leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

Arty McArtisan

I've been lackadaisically looking for art pieces for The Pad. In the process, plans for Sakura Blossom Robots and commissioned koreanninja murals have languished by the wayside.

Finally, I think I've found the art style that I've been looking for.

I simply adore John Lytle Wilson's work.

Of course his exhibitions are all on the East coast and the cost for an 8x4 artpiece are most likely woefully out of my price range, so I suppose I'll have to rely on Plan B:

1. Seduce John Lytle Wilson,
2. Have his man-babies,
3. Force our genetically-impossible children into slave labour to paint murals for The Pad.
4. Try to put aside 5% of each paycheque into a college fund for the kids. Just because they're genetic freaks doesn't mean that they don't deserve a good education.
   

Three cheers for good ol' Plan B.

(C) Elephant Love Medley

AA: Love's a strange and fickle creature; hey, do you think love's a she or a he?

CF: A 'she' because love is crazy *grin*
Or maybe a 'he' because love is stubborn...
No, wait... that's still a 'she'...

--

"Why not?" indeed.

Convenience trumps [it] every time.

--

ST: I was only told that before [her], you didn't believe in love. Which implies that after [her], you did.

BR: Not quite... it's more that before [her] I believed that I had already felt love. Now I'm not so sure.

--

KH: "[My Husband] thought you were just wanting to get in my pants. Sorry, would have let you crash here if we had been awake / gracious enough to answer the phone."

--

BL: Will you be part of my friend test.. if ever I date a guy serious enough to go through a test?

BN: As the guy friend, count on me to take him to a strip bar, get drunk, and hear the real unfiltered scoop from him *thumbs up*

Unrelated

How did "2 to 4" become "6 to 8"?

I suppose I can make an exception for people flying in from out of town. Dinner Party at the Pad!

Now where'd I put my "Kiss the Chef" apron...

--

I keep talking to others about how you should not expect change to occur overnight, yet I'm guilty of doing the same. I suppose what I should be preaching is that only expecting change does very little to enact change. If you want the change to happen, you should be proactive about it; meet it head on.

-- Posted May 2, 2005

Different context, same sentiment. I'm tired trying to be proactive, can't you do it just this once?

*ring* *ring*

. . .

Sure. Why not? =D

Brain... umm... ear fluid leakage

EPIPHANY

[composed rants and raves of grr's and arg's]

Dude, quit acting so jealous. It's unseemly.

What?! I'm not jealous, what I'm talking about is... I'm not j... shit... fuck me... It all makes sense now.

*slow clap* Let's give it up for Captain Oblivious

--

PERCEPTIONS

You're driving a car.

The person next to you is staring out the side window at the bunnies and puppy dogs playing in the snow. This person thinks everything is fine and dandy.

You're looking down the road trying to navigate this darned jalopy and keep it on the road.

Heh, jalopy. That's a funny word.

--

KRIS-TOE-MAS

Guess what I got for Christmas!

. . .

Yes, more Starbucks / coffee related goods. But that wasn't what I was talking about.

. . .

Yes, more booze related goods as well. But that wasn't what I was talking about.

. . .

Oh I'll just tell you, it's www.brucenguyen.ca
=O

(H) Brain Diarrhea

Following your gut
I shouldn't have changed my flight schedule. Should have stuck with the original plan.

Note to future self: Being snowed in is not a divine sign.

Like, srsly...
Did somebody stick a "Set me up with your friend" sign on my back? Cause I'm not meaning to be advertising. In fact, I'm not even for sale.

[hidden] I'm for rent *wink* [/hidden]

All I want for Christmas...
You always want what you don't have?
But if the only thing you ever wanted is something you never possessed, does that support the theory or does that just make it coincidental?

My gift giving mantra
I have a list of 'must-gift' (family, mainly), then I have a list of 'like-to-gift'. If you're on my 'like-to-gift' list, I'll only gift you something if I happen across that ideal item. No gift-giving for the sake of gift-giving.

So if you don't receive a gift from me this year, it's not that I wasn't looking for one, it's that I couldn't find one that would do you justice

[hidden] ... because I wasn't looking hard enough, haha [/hidden]

Also, for my 'must-gift' list, my mantra is if you can't find a gift that's meaningful, give a gift that's regiftable.

I think I'm in love...
You're petite, incredulously cute, and possess a wicked imagination.

At times you can be shy - even naive - and find it hard to express and deal with certain emotions. Yet you are one of the strongest person I've seen, able to take initiative and follow through when you find something you're passionate about.

One of the most selfless persons I've ever seen, you can also be quirky and mischievousness at the same time.

A short time spent with you leaves me smiling for hours.

Who are you? You are Amelie Poulain.

Yes, I'm a little late to the party. Sue me. Break me. Shake me. Hate me. Take me over.

The appeal of Amelie as a character derives from the spoken narrative as well as journeying as an invisible third party by her side. From outward appearances, somebody like Amelie may seem... kind of weird and creepy, actually. But because we see this intimate narrative, we have a deeper understanding of her.

Without that narrative and following along her life, would you have cared about or even noticed Amelie? If not, then what other opportunities are you missing out on because you never thought to give the other person a chance?

Then again, Amelie does strike me as one of a kind...

[hidden] I would *so* do Amelie in a heartbeat :P [/hidden]

All I Want For Christmas...

Somebody asked what I want for Christmas. I answered:

"A story.
In a box.
Wrapped up all pretty-like.

I'll hold the gift up to my ear and shake it gently in my hands. Tiny whisperings will leak out from the cracks; teasing with faint hints of an epic story that's begging to be told.

A story in pictures, a story in words,
A way to say what's yet to be heard.
Make use of a brush or the rhythm of rhyme,
To a song or a melody, I'll never say 'nein'."

Yeah, that didn't make much sense to me either. But I suppose if I were to try and derive meaning from it, it would be that I don't want the gift per say, I just want to know the story behind the gift.

"It's not a roll of pennies, it's piggy-bank bacon. I wanted to amalgamate your apparently contradictory passions for pork and protecting wild life. *smile*"

"I made this see-saw figure for you. Do you remember what see-saws represent?"

"[edited out since I'm going to put this in a Christmas card :D]"

Brain vomit

Paving Roads
What is the impetus for creating roads? These days, we know where a road will lead before we build it.

But let's step back to a time before roads were paved with tar.
Step back again to before they were compressed compounds of dirt.
Step back to when they were but paths etched out in the grassy plains through repeated travels.
Step back to that first step that would forge a new path that would build a road that would grant access to untold opportunity.

Was was the impetus for that first step? Survival? Wonderment? Disillusionment?

Honestly though, who the fuck cares?

--

I can kill you with my brain!
Guy beside me in class: "Wait, wait... stop right there. Just let me... reflect on this... ... ... ... Oooohhhhh! ... ... But wait..."

Me: If we all concentrate really, REALLY hard, I think we can choke him to death with our brains!

--

Christmas Gifts
It the thought that counts? Bullshit.

To paraphrase a movie quote: Deep down you may still be that same great person you used to be. But it's not who you are underneath, it's what you do that defines you.

If you really care about somebody, don't get something for them, do something for them.

Yes, I know 'getting something' is technically 'doing something'. But it's the motivation and reason behind it that really... aww fugnuts. I guess it really is the thought that counts.

--

See-saws
Relationships are like a see-saw. To really make it work, you both have to have the same weight invested in it, you both have to push, and you both have to trust the other isn't about to jump off without warning.

Yadda, yadda, [insert amateur analysis] yadda [insert thinly veiled metaphor for my current state of mind] yadda yadda.

--

Conversations
[Insert edited-real-life or completely-made-up conversation dialog that's really a thinly veiled metaphor]

--

Las Vegas
It's alright. But it just doesn't compare.

Not even close.

It's that time of year again...

There are lots of other events and shows, Festival of Trees @ 4 seasons, Carol Ships cruises, Xmas @ Burnaby Village, etc, but the following are typically my mainstays

[hidden] Yes, because most of them are free. [/hidden]

40th Annual Singing Christmas Tree Musical
Date(s): Fri Dec 8 to Mon Dec 11 AND Fri Dec 15 to Mon Dec 18
Time: Various times
Cost: Free
Location: Broadway Church (2700 East Broadway)

Trinity Street Lights Competition
Date: Mid December-ish
Time: After sunset
Cost: Free
Location: Trinity Street in East Vancouver, between Renfrew and Nanaimo

Festival of Lights
Date(s): Fri Dec 15 to Dec 31 (closed on Christmas Day)
Time: 5pm - 9:30pm
Cost: $11.65 per person or $22.30 for a 'family' of four.
Location: Van Dusen Botanical Gardens (5251 Oak Street)

Winter Solstice Lantern Festival
Date: Friday Dec 22
Time: 6pm - 10pm
Cost: Free
Location(s): West End, Yaletown, Granville Island Strathcona/Chinatown, East Side/Commercial Drive

If the last couple years are any gauge, I'll also be watching, "It's a Wonderful Life", hitting the slopes at least once, and mourning my pitiful attempts to create that perfect batch of hot chocolate.

And I'll probably be on a farm.

Rush, rush, rush

So I spend 30 minutes trying to call a cab to get me to my helicopter, but my phone's auto-redial isn't being able to cut through the incessant busy signal.

Not wanting to waste any more time, I wake up my friend, we hurriedly drive to the heliport, and I leave my car keys in her care until I return in 4 weeks time.

I make it to the heliport 2 minutes before my scheduled departure.

"I'm sorry sir, all flights have been put on standby until at least noon"


. . .


So you're saying I can crawl back in bed now? =D

[hidden] A pessimist would have said, you mean I could STILL be in bed right now? I'm always the optimist *grin* [/hidden]

Now why did I have to go and do that?

1. Ageless mind dwarf exercise

2. Kick Bud Trexler

3. A Gentleman's dim lighting footprint

Oh, such fun fun fun times... [hidden] I'd like some smart-ass to go with my sarcasm, please [/hidden]

So it's official...

Work is sending me to Las Vegas for a couple weeks in late November / early December.

Instead of flying back to Vancouver for the weekends, I'm considering flying straight from Victoria to Vegas, then once that stint is over, flying straight back to Victoria.

That means I may not be in Vancouver for the next month or more.

*shrug*

Can you give me a reason to come back to Vancouver?

10 years ...

... to the day.

How would my life have been different? How would I have been different?

[hidden] Do you ever unconsciously start poking at scar tissue? I can't imagine that it's healthy, but it sure is addictive. [/hidden]

Things I like

So a consultant, a dental assistant, and a concierge walk into a bar... oh, have I told you this one already? Never mind then. Let's talk of things I like.

Hidden smiles
You know the ones. Where for some reason or another, you're trying to hold back a smile. But you can't. And all of a sudden it's unleashed in a big toothy grin.

Rebellious, lone strands of hair
And the plucking thereof.

Unpredictability in others
I think I understand people, their motivations, and their tendencies. I like to be shown wrong every now and then. Keeps me humble. I haven't been very humble lately.

Long-ish hair (clean)
Full, pleasing locks flowing through my fingers.

1st times
That beating heart, sweaty palms, and rush of adrenalin creating a mixture of excitement and anxiety... Do you remember your first time? The vivid, almost overpowering sensations... the sweet fragrances that seemed to fill your senses... the feelings... the textures... the tastes...

Oh, to re-experience my first corossolier + condensed milk drink or my first rambutan.

[hidden] Freshly pressed apple juice is cool, but it just doesn't compare. [/hidden]

Year Two in Review

This blog is turning two years old. The word that summed up Year One was "Transition". The word or phrase that encapsulates Year Two?

"What if." [hidden] Actually, that's just the word or phrase that captures this particular moment of reflection [/hidden]

What if I moved out?
What if I grew a goatee?
What if I could really believe it?
What if I tried a different career path?
What if she could be celebrating her 10th birthday?

Ended up doing the first, trying the second, mistiming the third, and discounting the forth. As for the fifth? Well... that one is purely hypothetical.

It's hard to believe it's been that long.